Things I wish my doctor had told me about anxiety.

  1. Memory loss is a bitch. Say goodbye to passwords, PIN numbers, names, plotlines of your favorite books and movies, appointments and dates. You had better write that shit down otherwise you’re going to be standing on a street corner in Prahran crying because you don’t know how to get home and can’t remember your PIN number to get into your phone. You’re going to lose wallets, handbags, clothes and really important shit, so have backups for everything.
  2. Sometimes everything will set it off, sometimes nothing will. It’s like that surprise you never wanted and there is no point spending months trying to avoid situations that ‘might’ set it off because SURPRISE you’ll just start having palpitations on your couch watching Netflix instead.
  3. Medication is also a bitch, and doctors hate prescribing benzo’s. You’ll have to go on anti-depressants which SURPRISE makes your anxiety worse and triggers your old eating disorder, which means as a bonus you’ll have to be put on anti-psychotics so you can actually sleep and eat. ALL OF THESE THINGS ARE GOING TO HAVE SHITTY SIDE EFFECTS.
  4. You’re going to be tired. Like, REALLY tired for no good reason and no amount of sleeping will fix that. Oh, you want to go to the shops or out for coffee? LOLLLL you’ll last 5 minutes before you turn into a cranky bitch and need a nap. Take the nap, trust me.
  5. Self care is a very real thing and is going to turn into a full time job. You’re going to have to be realistic about your limits and don’t worry about what anybody else thinks because pushing yourself past what you can handle is going to mean you’re going to have a breakdown a lot sooner.
  6. Say goodbye to your sex drive. Scrunch it up and throw it out the window and replace it with guilt over not being good enough for your partner. There. Much better.
  7. You know how coffee used to be your best friend? Yeah well imagine that best friend slept with your boyfriend, drove a screwdriver into your thigh and stole your car. It hates you now and anything caffeinated is not even close to worth it.
  8. Neurotypical people aren’t going to get it, so just do you and refer to #5 because your health is going to have to come first for a little while. You’ll get through it though, you are a badass and you’ve got this.

 

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